Building Resilience - How To Practice Communicating Resilience at Work

This week has been a heavy week of conversations I've had with women in business across the board. From working moms, to daycare teachers, to small business owners, to females climbing the ladder in corporate. 

The resounding theme? Feeling stuck, not knowing how to weather the storm, and not feeling  valued. 

Word for word I heard from one woman “They say it’s business but that to me makes me feel like I’m replaceable and it’s sad when I pour my heart out in my job” 

And here's where it gets interesting… 

Recently, I attended a conference for B2B Tech Revenue leaders and the theme of the conference? How to grow revenue and support your teams in 2023. Specifically, how to grow revenue when the market is tough, when layoffs are happening every other day, when businesses are consistently cost cutting and when no one knows how long this storm will last. 

The one skillset leaders are looking for in their teams amongst the chaos? Resilience. 

And yet… something didn’t sit well with that response. Because how many leaders know how to manage to or lead people through resilience building? 

My hot take? Business doesn't afford the people the time, resources, or support to learn how to build resilience. 

Because business operates on monthly and quarterly deadlines, there is zero time or attention paid to the individuals who are being hit with the wind and the waves of the storm. 

In your personal life, when you go through turbulent times (a big move, job loss, breakup, a loss, etc) think about how long it takes you to recover and move forward. It takes time –  ‘two steps forward, three steps back’ kind of time. There are days on end where you wake thinking to yourself “just put one foot in front of the other” or “moment by moment” (that was a new mantra I personally adopted this year) and yet if you ever had that mentality for an extended period of time at work, you’d likely be penalized for it. 

In the world of sales, that looks like being put on a performance plan. And in other parts of corporate, you might be subtly let go. Or impacted by layoffs. Or point blank fired. 

However it shakes out, business does not afford us the time, resources, or support to learn how to build resilience. 

So let’s start having a conversation about it. We can’t change business overnight. And business will always be business. But we can start using our voice. And bringing our power – through our experiences and stories – back into the room. 

Because business isn’t just business. People drive business. Business is human (as much as the conversation around AI would like to contest). Bringing humanity back into the workplace is a downright rebellion of it’s own. 

Here’s how to practice communicating resilience - 

If your boss thinks you’re “slacking off” after you’ve experience a huge life changing event, 

“Hey xx, it’s been hard having a new baby at home and I think I’ve been adjusting fairly well given the circumstances. That said, point taken and understood and I’ll make sure to keep focus on [xyz]. Thanks for having my back here at work"

If you need to work on your mental health (therapy anyone? I go to therapy on a biweekly basis) -  

“Hey xx, starting next month, [insert day + time], I will be out of pocket as there is a standing personal matter I need to adhere to moving forward”

If you’re having a hard time and need to express it, 

“Hey xx, I recognize my output has been suffering due to hardships I’ve been experiencing both inside and outside the workplace. At this point in time, I’m communicating this to be transparent and to ask for some grace. Appreciate your support”

These examples are opportunities for you to not only practice speaking up but its an opportunity to showcase you are working on building the skill of resilience. 

Everyone is dealing with different challenges not only in their personal lives but in the workplace too. Immense changes have been thrown our way in the last 3 years and it is HARD to navigate through it – let alone with our head held high performing at our ultimate best for a company.

Business won’t give you the opportunity to learn how to build resilience, but with the help of Career Civility, I will do my best to help give you the tools and communication scripts you need to keep persevering in the workplace.