Tips + Tricks For Dealing With a Difficult Boss
Every week I ask the Career Civility community what emails/situations they need help with in the workplace and every week I do my best to provide actionable and tactical communication advice to help them navigate the politics and drama of the corporate world.
My favorite submission from this past week? “Dealing with an a-hole boss”
Because LOL #relatable we’ve all been there, haven’t we?
A year ago, I posted a Tiktok explaining how to deal with difficult people in the workplace and today, I’m doubling down on that advice and also expanding the advice and options to help you maintain your sanity when dealing with those hard-to-work-with bosses/clients/colleagues.
First things first -
Control what you can control
Focus on what YOU need to do to be successful in your role and in your day to day. That is what you can control. And when you inevitably need to work with other (potentially difficult) people in order to get the work done, control how YOU respond in the situations, interactions, and conversations. The do’s and don’t of this could look like,
Don’t make rude comments
Don’t respond to passive aggressive emails
DO decide what is worth your energy – difficult people get a rise out of making other people uncomfortable. Don’t engage if it is not worth your time or energy.
DO take the high road. Especially in professional environments – most of the time difficult people are not worth losing your paycheck or healthcare coverage
Second –
2. Document, document, document
Documenting the situations with your difficult boss will be somewhat cathartic and a release of stress. It will also serve as data points you can look back on – and potentially use for reporting purposes – if escalation ever needs to occur. Here are some ideas for documentation,
Document the tasks, projects, and emails you are working on with the individual(s)
Document the interactions and roadblocks – with dates and timestamps
Document your wins! This is important. The wins can be big or small but whenever you feel accomplished, write it down and celebrate it!
From there, you can choose which route you’d like to take…
Speak up
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again but use your voice and take up space. Your ideas are valuable, you are worthy of respect, and you are a successful professional who deserves to be heard and listened to.
In order to encourage speaking up, lean on effective and civil communication as the tool in your toolbox when dealing with difficult people. Use the tips from previous blog posts and conversations we’ve had in the Career Civility community.
OR if speaking up is not an option and doesn’t feel right (listen to your gut) then…
Remove yourself from the situation
Sometimes, it’s not possible to avoid their emails or decline attendance to a meeting. So as much as we can work to control what we can control, sometimes difficult people are unavoidable. So let me ask you this,
Can you work around them?
Is it possible to transfer teams/clients?
Is it time to find a new job?
Can you afford to quit?
What other options can you explore that will make your life less stressful and your business acumen more productive?
When it comes to dealing with difficult people in the workplace, take whichever piece of advice/option feels most comfortable and safe for YOU and for the situation.
Interpersonal skills and interpersonal relationships are nuanced. It depends on the day, the mood, the season, the stress, the deadlines and whatever other variables might arise between you and your difficult boss/coworker/client. But Career Civility is always here to help you communicate through each unique situation.
You’ve got this, my friend.
