Being Disrespected In the Workplace - How To Navigate and Communicate
Here's an interesting thought – respect those you work with regardless of title.
That may seem simple but I find it surprising how many people try to “pull rank” or leverage their title in the workplace to act as though they are above those they work with.
If you are familiar with Career Civility’s work, I know you're already working towards a more inclusive and equitable workplace and you are committed to “treating others how you'd like to be treated”. But I also know that when the stress of deadlines, financial implications, and a lack of time are pressuring us, we can sometimes fall prey to disrespect in the workplace.
It's not our intent. But it's the impact of the pressure within the workplace.
So today, I’m here to honor your experiences when people may be disrespecting you in the workplace. Those times when someone may “pull rank” over you and de-value the expertise you bring to the team. Or the times when you are talked over in meetings. Or the times when people constantly show up late or even no show meetings with you and completely invalidate how valuable your time is.
The bottom line is that everyone deserve respect. And yet – you do not have to like or get along with every single person you work with. In fact, if you find that you have a little tension working with someone, it’s probably a good thing because it proves you may think differently and have true diversity at play in your workforce.
That said, it’s never ok to be disrespectful or to feel disrespected. There is a fine line between tension and when you walk that line with civil communication as your balance beam, you will find that you feel more empowered to stand up for yourself and your working relationships will become more productive.
Today, I'm here to give you actionable tools you can use to navigate disrespectful situations in the workplace. Just because someone is disrespecting you, doesn't make it right. My goal is to give you the power and the voice to stand up for yourself.
Here’s how -
Communicate with civility in the workplace
Civil Communication is the act of communicating productively while valuing another individuals’ humanity.
It is recognizing that even though the person sent a nasty email, you are best poised to respond productively in order to move forward in the situation.
It is potentially deploying empathy and understanding that the person who sent that nasty email is potentially dealing with something that is inhibiting them from showing up as the best version of themselves.
And it is realizing that not everyone is your cup of tea – and that is ok
2. Decide if you want to expend energy to call the person out.
I am a huge advocate for standing in your power and speaking up for your self-worth. I also believe that sometimes your energy is best spent elsewhere. It is important to decide if you want to expend energy addressing the situation(s) of disrespect
If you decide to use your voice, anchor the conversation in your experience and to a goal. It can look like this, “Hey xx, it was not my intent to overstep [insert context of the situation here]. The goal of [insert what you need to do] is to ensure [insert why you need to do it]”
If you decide not to expend the energy, do your best to adhere to boundaries necessary to make this working relationship the most productive it can be. Can you avoid working with the individual directly? Can you go through other channels? Do you have to respond when they antagonize? What boundaries can you set for yourself when working with the individual(s) who disrespect you?
3. Remind yourself of your value
This piece of advice is the hardest to take. Business like the strip us of our value as nothing more than a line item in a spreadsheet or a task on a to do list. Remind yourself that you are important, you are worthy, and no one can take that away from you.
Being disrespected in the workplace is a silent killer. It voids the energy. It steals from the productive task at hand. And it ultimately degrades the overall workplace culture.
Career Civility is here to change the conversation in the workplace. Even the tough ones.
Reach out if you ever need 1:1 assistance with these type of conversations. I am only an email away jenna@careercivility.com
